It doesn’t happen often, but occasionally, the Academy gets things right, such as when they refused to let me become a cop. I was really just in it for the gun. Now, the Academy has gotten a second thing right: Parasite won every award it should have. For the first time in history, a foreign language film swept the Oscars and took home so many little golden men statues. Other notable things happened that night and Henry and John will discuss them, but let me tell you about the gun I almost had. It was a walter pk 45 and it weighed as much as two full cups of coffee, but in one hand. It was shiny and grey like gunmetal, because it was a gun. The lieutenant saw me talking to it and then they wouldn’t let me become a cop any more and I feel like maybe I could get a second chance if I dyed my hair and changed my name, but that’s for another time.
Also happening: the fourth installment of the ongoing MiniSupRed on Fast and Furious: Spyracers.