E3. The glorious time of year when people wearing sports jackets, jeans, and sneakers find stages to lie to some of the most vindictive people on the planet in order to sell more video games than the previous sports jacket, jeans, and sneaker clad snake oil salesman. And Henry and John dedicate a basically two hour episode to it every year. How wonderful. This year, we’re not going to focus on the specs, but on the games. We’ve got 50 game reviews, 15 world exclusive presentation reviews, 90 trailer reviews, and a whole lot more coming in early 2019. And we’re happy to announce something everyone has been waiting for. Zero Credit(s) Battle Royale. That’s right. Control up to two characters, either Henry or John, and fight with one other person to become the one true Host of the Show. It’s minutes of fun every match, but not as fun as opening one of the game’s many types of Gear Creates. You can earn Gear Creates just from playing a match, but if you want to open it, you have to make a series of micro-transactions in the in-game store hub on various cosmetic items that you can use to decorate your Henry or John. Each purchase has a 5% chance to drop a Gear Creates Key Crate, which may or may not contain a key, depending on your overall luck in life. These keys can be used to open Gear Creates, which contain some of the most powerful weapons in video game history: a sense of accomplishment and satisfaction. In the meantime, enjoy the in-depth review of this year’s E3. It was okay.
It’s finally time for the first episode of 2018. But first,
ZERO CREDIT(S) EPISODE THREAT INBOUND TO YOUR EARS. SEEK IMMEDIATE SHELTER. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
Henry and John are back at full capacity to discuss all the things they missed in the past two weeks. What Henry thought might be a quick introduction to 2018 segment soon overtakes the entire G.D. episode as they discuss false ballistic missile alerts, fat shaming our mentally disable president, and Nintendo’s latest announcement of a bunch of stupid pieces of cardboard for the low price of 60-70 U.S. Dollars. They also wanted to discuss what’s happening to the bitcoin, but they forgot to and so the sentiment becomes like so many empty promises in the wind, dust to dust, ashes to ashes. We’re promising new and better things in 2018, starting right here, right now, in this Capital G, Capital D frickin’ episode.